Stake Land (Jim Mickle)

My brother and I went to see the film together, he wanted to go and see Green Hornet and I wanted to go and see a comedy. As a peace maker we decided to go and see the next film that was showing; BIG MISTAKE.

Everyone knows that these days vampires are less like Dracula and more like glittery action men - they're definitely not blood sucking zombies...
The first thing that happened in the film was that the main character, Martin's parents and baby sister were murdered by the zombie "vamps" and some unknown vampire killer called "Mister" killed the vampire and took Martin away, he didn't even cry for his family.

I've never been so bored watching a film, quite a few people actually left but my brother doesn't like wasting money so we stayed. Definitely not a recommendation.


Acting skill: 1/5
Script: 1/5
Quality of director: 1/5
Enjoyment: 0/5
Overall: 3/20 (that sounds a bit too generous)

Robert Breer at Baltic

When first walking into the gallery space I was greeted by a woman telling me to be careful where I step as lots of people had been standing on the artwork. When I looked around I could see how people would step on the artwork but the thought of people stepping on a piece of foam with hundreds of cocktail sticks sticking out of it amused me, especially since the pieces were slowly moving. I rarely read the programme before I see an installation because I figure that I'll see what it's about when I see it and if I want more information I'll look afterwards, but I normally make up my own narrative anyway. So, I didn't read the programme and didn't know the pieces would be moving, then I saw a white dome which was almost my height and about five times my radius, it was heading towards me at snail speed. I thought I was seeing things but no, after closer inspection it was moving! I went round everything and stooped to see if they were moving, they were. Even what appeared to be a wall was moving. It was hilarious seeing people share my shock as they too realised that they were slowly being chased by seemingly inanimate objects.

Very fun but a small grievance I had was that some of the pieces were from the 60's and 70's, and it showed! There were visible bumps and scratches which could have benefited from some attention to make them more appealing. Other than the need for paint, I greatly enjoyed this exhibition.

Almost forgot to mention the sketches, if you get a chance to go, don't forget to look at the back of the gallery as there's amusing sketches, sketches that I deeply wanted to take home!

Enjoyment: 90%

Lecture at Glasgow University Open Day

(This is more of a blog than a review)
Yesterday I went to an open day at Glasgow University and I went to a French lecture, the professor was a quirky guy and spend the whole lecture debating English subtitles on French films and how they showed the difference between “Tu” and “Voux” (two words for “you” but with different connotations and politeness, like “you” and “thou” even though thou is almost never used these days, it is sort of like voux as it shows that you’re respecting somebody) the words for using tu and voux are tutoyer and vouvoyer, accordingly.

We were shown some cleverly translated clips to do with the translation of “tu.” The sentence was “qui la baise sont tu” (or something similar, my french is so bad) which means “who the fuck are you?” but to show that the person was speaking down in the phrase with the word “tu”, the translators used “who do you think you are, pal?” they bypassed the taboo language (often all of the taboo words are taken out of the translation if there is a lot being said as there’s a certain number of characters that can be on screen at once and a certain amount of time that it’s on screen for so the translator will try and get the point across and may have to sacrifice the variety of language being used) but got the informality there.

My problem is that I have some French films in my pile of unwatched films and also some on my list of films that I’d like to buy but now I just know that instead of taking in the story or beauty of the films, I’ll be listening out for “tu” and “voux” and using my crappy knowledge of French to see which words have been lost in translation.

I don’t know, I just thought it was interesting.

Dylan Moran - Yeah, yeah.

(Comedy reviews are more of a quick note)

This was the first comedienne I'd been to see. Even though I had nothing to compare it to, I'd say it was very enjoyable.
Moran handled a heckler very well with witty remarks [though I would have liked to maim him in some way...] Everybody was laughing and the jokes came throughout the stories he was telling.

One small disappointment that I has was that the jokes were all at the same level of funny, lots of laughing but no gasping for breath.

Overall I was left with lots to think about and I had a great night.

Enjoyment: 8/10.

Who's Afraid Of Virginia Woolf?

Name: Who's Afraid Of Virginia Woolf?
Theatre: Northern Stage (Newcastle)
Date: Thursday 28th April 2011

When my Dad asked if I wanted to go to see this I'd never heard of it before, I actually thought it was going to be about Virginia Woolf... How wrong I was. I didn't get round to reading the description until I went for sushi beforehand. The description made me think of Abigail's Party and I was a little more excited about the three hour play.

When my Dad and I went to find our seats, the theatre that we should be familiar with we were greeted by a set which had transformed the whole theatre. The set was amazing, if it had walls it would have been the best part of a house! Seats were to the left, right and in front of the part of the set where the living room was. Having such a large and detailed stage allowed each member of the audience to feel like a fly on the wall on the strange events of the scenes that unfolded; scenes of an 'after-party-drinks-party' 

I won't go into detail but there was everything I needed to keep my interest for three hours. Severe tension, humour, politics, relationships, things I could relate to and a wild twist.
When the lights faded on in the interval my Dad and I looked at each other and we could only muster the start of sentences but couldn't quite find the words to end them so we left it as "Well..." as the lights went down again and we were invited back into the awkward travesty that was the evening at the after-party to witness the twist! 

The only negative thing I will say about that evening was the regret that I felt afterwards that I hadn't booked tickets for all of the nights...

Ratings:
Script - 5/5
Cast - 5/5 - amazing.
Stage Directions -  4/5 - I prefered the scenes when there was only body language rather than movement etc. (and lets face it, it wouldn't be my blog if I'd given 5/5 for everything!)
Venue - 5/5 - Always love Northern stage.

Overall enjoyment  95/100
 

René Magritte

Ce n'est pas une revue d'art...

When I was thinking of things to say about Magritte’s work I figured that “thought provoking” would be a good thing to say - then I realised that logic can’t be applied to Magritte’s work, you simply have to enjoy and accept it.

Whilst I was in Brussels recently I decided to pop into the Magritte museum, I’d seen it before it was opened when the building was covered in a Magritte sheet:

I expected dreary classical portraits of the Virgin Mary and Jesus, hunters posing next to their dogs and flemish fruit bowls like you’ll find next door in the Musées royaux des Beaux-Arts de Belgique (that’s the ‘Royal museum of fine art in Belgium’ for those of us who don’t speak french) Lets just say I was bracing myself for a bored slob around a pretentious collection. I knew my first impression had been wrong when I got into the lift taking me from the royal museum to the Magritte museum, for starters the lift had a window and every floor we passed, we passed another section of her body. The museum was dark but well presented, even the information was lovingly routed into wood on the walls.

When I saw the first couple of pieces I had to remark on them all; “what, why, how...eh?” my parents couldn’t summon the answers, neither could the information on the walls or probably anyone but Magritte himself, so we carry on around the museum and laugh, exchange double or singular raised eyebrows or just stare to see if that would gather any reasoning. I did find Magritte’s work was somewhat humorous but [potentially unintentionally] symbolistic, though I still can’t figure out what this orb is all about:

There were parts of the museum where you could see pieces form Magritte’s sketch book or scraps of paper where he’d played games with his friends that could have inspired him. There was also a display of posters which I really enjoyed. When Magritte is being himself and painting ‘normally’ it’s marvellous, the surrealism mixed with his technique is great but then there’s times when he tried to be someone else, someone who was trying to be fauvist or post impressionist; the idea behind the painting was good and weird as ever but the off-style soured the painting for me. I was also disappointed by his sculpture work, they seemed to be 3D images of his paintings, in fact I’m pretty sure one of them was a 3D image of one of his paintings. I loved his paintings because they make you question what you’re seeing and also what you can’t see but in his sculptures you can see everything and it just seemed like he was ripping himself off, sadly.

I have to say, I did enjoy the gift shop! I bought a notebook with the pipe that claims not to be a pipe on the front, a book on Magritte and a little badge. If I wasn’t flying home (hand-luggage only) that afternoon I would have bought Magritte espresso cups, Magritte plates, Magritte ties, Magritte fridge magnets... I would have gone to town to say the least, the posters were only €12! One thing I would say though is that there was an abundance of books that people didn’t seem to be buying, there’s always an abundance of books in art gallery/ museum gift shops, come on, everyone just uses the internet these days, even though I bought a book to read on the plane...

Overall I loved the gallery space, I loved the layout and I definitely loved Magritte and his work. The Musées royaux des Beaux-Arts de Belgique has definitely made my list of ‘Things to re-visit in Brussels’ which, I think, is a massive compliment!

Magritte’s work: 5/5 (for the classic pieces)
Curating: 4/5
Gallery: 4.5/5

That’s 90% enjoyment!

Nerys Johnson “Flower Imagery Over Time” & Aether and Hemera “The Colour of Phi”

From Saturday 19th March until Monday 2nd May. (2011)

In the DLI (Durham Light Infantry) art gallery there’s a retrospective exhibition of Nerys Johnson’s work between 1970 and 1989. The exhibition looks at the progression of Nerys’ style by focusing on the work that she based on three types of flowers; Tulips, Lilies and Sunflowers. Nerys was terribly affected by arthritis since she was a child and sadly died following an operation in 2001. She said that flowers were a major source of inspiration for her work because “They grow, change, decay and metamorphose.”

Running alongside the Nerys Johnson exhibition is Aether and Hemera’s “The Colour of Phi” This is a light installation of coloured wires crossing over and creating patterns in the light. The light pattern is based on the Golden Ratio which is used by architects, artists and designers but is also found in flower petals and pine cones. Aether and Hemera (more commonly known as Claudio and Gloria) are both Italian and, now based in North-east England, they specialise in new media and lighting. 

Nerys’ style is very strong, it looks like she dived into her paintings without looking where she was going and it just worked. The thick stalks of the plants and the bright colours made her paintings seem child-like but they were done very skilfully, she seemed to know exactly when to finish painting, without adding neeless finishing touches that often spoil contemporary work. I thought the film of Nerys painting and talking about her art was very eye opening, I didn’t know very much about Nerys before yesterday but I felt like I got to know her though her work.

On it’s own, I loved Aether and Hemera’s piece. It was intriguing and I stared at it for ages  because it felt as if it was moving though it was still or like it was flashing even though the light was constant. Using the Golden Ratio couldn’t have made this piece any easier to make! Everything seemed very precise and I was impressed by the piece, though it would have been much stronger if the room was darker, a black sheet draped over the door would have sufficed...

 Individually I liked most of Nerys’ work but I think that if the whole show was curated differently it could have been really amazing. Nerys’ work was packed onto the walls, this didn’t compliment her style which is immature and childish yet boldly confident with a clear idea. With all of the work crammed into the walls it made the pieces weaker and less striking. Nerys herself used to curate exhibitions in a similar style but I think she took more care in which pieces were on the line that you pay most attention to. It would have been really brave and bold if the curator had gone against Nerys’ curating style and put only a few amazing pieces in the exhibition or played with the composition. Nerys’ playful art could have been been reflected in the way that it was put on the walls but sadly, it wasn’t and it seemed to make the individual pieces less special.

Also, the link between the two exhibitions seems strained, Nerys painted and drew flowers and the light was constructed like the golden ratio of a petal’s anatomy. In my oppinion, it’s a great shame that the two shows weren’t more integrated as they could have really complimented each other.

I felt quite out of place in the gallery space as it felt more like going to a church coffee morning than the opening of a new art show. The old socks-and-sandals crowd agitated me. It seemed as if they were more bothered by the free coffee and cakes than the skill of the artists. The adjective “marvellous” was extremely overused and a woman actually commented that I “lower the average age of this gathering by about 20%!” With a bit of advertising around Durham university or some cafes there would have been some more young people who would have probably used more interesting adjectives than “marvellous!”



Nerys’ work: 3/5
Aether and Hermera’s work: 4/5
Curating: 1/5
Gallery: 2.5/5


Overall enjoyment: 55%